From Love
to Sex and Back Again
Robin Scott Peters
Published
By
Robin Scott Peters at Smashwords
Copyright 2012
Robin Scott Peters
Smashwords Edition, License
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MORNING KISS
My love, I await your morning kiss
bring
me to your beautiful eyes
your warm hands
holding me
My
heart leaps knowing I am yours
how I cherish the gift
that
springs eternal within me
as every sunrise breaks
I will only
love you more
My love, I await your morning kiss
for when I
awake
I have one more day with you.
8-24-90
11:11am
CINEMATIC
REMEMBRANCES
I was there again
moving down paths
of
decay
leaves windblown
on naked branches,
stark
fingers,
streak the sky
I move, drawn by
meandering
thoughts
suffocated by the aroma
of dreams
tasting my
dreams
flickering through cinematic remembrances
of childhood
days
that linger in the mist
of yesterday.
10-27-90 thru
11-10-90
DISTANCE
In my minds eye
I seek
pleasure from you,
why do I deny.
Only to wake
alone
in
cold sheets, listening
listening to the
monotonous
tones
raising from the radio
The pillows tossed
the sun
pierces into dust rays,
blurred by morning vision
why can't I
hold you?
choices
saving
grace
Build a
future
blaze a path to forever--
forget about the future
and
real time
Idealized time is our haven,
where we need to
be so
no one will enter our play...
2-1-89
5:00am
CONVENIENT
INCONVENIENCE
So, where do we go from here
you told me
not to
but I was already
It's funny when you think you're in
control
but you're not
I still don't understand what is
happening
what have we got here,
convenient inconvenience?
A
helping hand and a peck
or
A warm embrace and an orgasm?
It
doesn't really matter at this point
you put your token in
and
hope for the high score
but you don't even place.
Isn't
this jus like life...
So, where do I go from here
knowing
me I'll wait,
dreaming of what we were never suppose to have and
never did
a victim of a crime perpetrated and mastermind
by
myself, on myself, for myself
So, I should stop bitching
because I got
what I wanted.
right?
So, where does it go
from here
back where I belong
walking that line, carnal
I
know I'll choose one day
I just hope it's not too late.
But
I can't help to look back
and want what is there in front of me
I
guess I should ask what do you want?
I know
now
6-6-90
1:06am
MEANDER
Lost
doesn't quite describe
how I feel,
more like blank
as when
you clear your mind
Nothing is there
You see, take in
but
nothing registers,
Turmoil has settled
with its sunset
red
yellow rays
Piercing my existence.
Bring on the
cubicles
of my life, I wander
through them searching
for the
answer
why must I go.
now?
When it is all
at my
fingertips.
I look
my nails are dirty
even though I profess
them
to be cleansed
EUROPEAN AFTERNOON
The
end precedes the beginning
death laid in our hands
pretending
to be new life (born again)
heart seeps through clenched
fingers
holding on to nothing
which is what we
have.
Fooling ourselves into submission
as the piano
strings resonate
melancholy remnants
of forbidden
moments
European afternoons
driving to Vienna
no laws
as
it is here -- in the heat -- of the July afternoon
I envision
you playfully
fingering old music
named with others --
unknown
bought and sent with your smile
I am there
No power
to purchase what I desire
does it really matter if you return
you
were gone before you left.
Standing in the mirror
we faced
each other,
you were behind me
with that look
Searing the
pane which reflected
love to hate and back
again
Agonizing
Tantalizing
Sacrificing
I Scream
in wonderful silence
without sound -- You hear me.
The
panthers have met
and have torn the carcass of each
bleeding
they
kiss
retreating to lick their wounds
and again
kiss.
6-10-91
10:00am
RHYTHMICAL
FANTASY
Embraced by the shadow of the Cottonwood
entangled
perceptions milk the starred sky
edged with city glare
shafts
of light crease the darkness as we search for favorite pieces
marking
special moments etched eternally.
Funny how time moves
like hot
molasses
I cannot dab it with the bread of life
so I try to
scoop it with hands,
but, like kisses on thighs
I tremble and
the cool
crystalline shaft breaks
allowing time to stick to the
pieces
I try to gather them up but only cut and leak the agent of
life.
You laugh and gather the pieces
and draw my blood on
to
your sun-drenched form.
We bleed together
writing in
rhythmical fantasy
interrupted only by eyes, open.
Smiles,
simplistic.
Breath, full.
thoughts of others
6-14-91
thru 6-29-91
DUMB HEARTS
Pinnacles of Grace
laid across the
altar of my life
slash the spotless lamb;
nay,
but sand spews forth and,
an image of reality in
polished
molten pane...revealed...
It is the denial of what I say I have
claimed --
through fabricated words
to dimensionless images,
as they put forth accusations
fossilized belief, dead,
ancient
viewed through the crust of time
when each promise
layers the previous.
Burdened
with refracted truths
voiced
through tight lips
heard with open ears
believed with dumb
hearts
seemingly endless
tired.
2-24-91
DISTANT
COLORS BLUE
Hands touch
part of
me
controlling
pulsating life caressed
seep through
you,
emotions unexplored
know you are in my mind
hollowed
essences
emanating voices
images through myself
not of
me
yet mine.
My heart bleeds
in distant colors blue
I
grasp at laughing images
they call to me
with searing
orbs
etching their existence
in my soul
polished by my tears
--eternal.
10-25-92 thru 11-1192
AROMATIC
WHIRLPOOLS
Formed Flesh
exerting power over me
invading
my dreams
turbulent nights pass
as toy marionettes
cracked
with aged time
march by stretched hands
deny pained
desire
Aimless thoughts reveal my need
to press not enter
flesh's
aromatic whirlpools
plied with concrete fingers my
body racked with virgin tremors
stream into waves of
unconsciousness
desire met but in my sleep
broke by morning
come
11-14-92
THREE WIDE RIVERS
Emotional
pittances moving through space
sanctified by the encumbrances of
practicality
elements of my life drip to different directions
I
wish that I could siphon the flow
move it as I wish where all
could quench their
thirst no one dying of the lack of
sustenance
which is essential to our being.
Instead three wide
rivers
drain me for I am the point of creation
in which they
draw their need.
Trump cards in hand one trick short
waiting in
glared eyes for the proper moment
in which to lay their card in
false triumph.
Again I lose claiming victory and in defeat
I
ache, I smile and glance at my soul and
know that someday I will
understand the emotional
hell I gladly walk through for
you.
1992
YOUR VOICE
Divergent
remembrance of you
streak through matter formed
your thoughts
caress
my longing soul
moved by images captured
in still
clear sand
your voice
resonates through unseen winds
pulsed
my nature opens to you
swayed by your power I
lay my head drunk
mystified
mesmerized tranquilized
home safe in your score
deep
in you
11-6-92
WHAT WAS THE WHY
I
sate there and I wondered
why we were there, what was it that
we
were looking for?
What underlying reasons were floating
by
controlling us making us?
I sat there and wanted to ask
you
what you really thought, what it was
that you wanted to say
to me
what it was you wanted to share with me
what was the
why?
I sat there and wanted to tell you what it was that I
wanted,
what was it
that made me be there.
I looked at you, smiling
inside, knowing
I would not know why you were there.
So we
danced around some issue
that laid deep between us
because it
was the same thing --
I smiled inside because the dance
was
worth the pain of not being able
to ask what I really wanted to
ask
why, why were you there?
I needed to know but I was
scared.
I didn't want to lose the coffee and the shade of statues
and the dance.
11-18-92
11:02pm
"BOO"
Maniacal,
vicious, evil, hateful, pounding unjust cesspool verbiage
I
stand in amazement to your carnage of humanity
Selfish power
hungry grabbing at innocent lambs dressed in ripped blood torn
tongues
Shuddering, shrouded in dredged up memories freshly
bathed with your senseless blabbering
about what you know not
yet speak as if you are creator
Your viciousness is compounded
by my love for you
I stand amazed
who is this
this
this...Do
you know?
You can't believe the carnage you spewed forth
perpetrating some perverse fantasy
?and I love you?
and I
love you.
And I must lay the sacrificial ultimatum upon the
altar of friends
But I cannot tell you what is the
offering
It lies in your hand unseen by your clear eyes
You
must see it and offer or what is to become of us?
Distant
memories freshly bathed by ripped blood torn tongues.
1994
I
GUESS I LIVE IN THE GHETTO AFTER ALL
My ring they took my
ring
through tears and sobs
my guilt
Another story
black on black
I fight against the
institutional foe to
help
others like me
yet they stab and take
don't they see I am
them
live with them wake
with the struggle through
the sick
white black
have of underclass
surrealism.
Yet they rip my
flesh
frighten my progeny
oppress my soul mate
all
for...
My eyes moisten when I
think why my own must
tear
from me what I want most
to give freely
why must we be
so tangible
take my knowledge --my brother, my sister
Take
from me what I have
learned
Take from me the true power
which
you desire
I have it
I can give it to you freely
But you
see it as a white/black gift --worthless--
the
man-washed-brotha-preaching-bleached-words
so you steal--black
on black
you steal worthless meaningless
objects which die and
decay
just like the white man wants...right?
BLACK ON
BLACK
Wake up -- take what is truly for the taking
take HIS
power not mine
for I fight for you yet
you are blind to that
fact.
It does not mean that it is not true!
She cries
through fiber optic lines
pulling at the strings in my
heart.
My
ring, they took my ring
as I hear faintly in the background
the
fearful cry of our daughter.
1993
JAILHOUSE
ROCK
Passionately we look at each other
our breath
caressing, tickling the
skin, alive vibrant.
Our eyes locked,
knowingly trading
spokenless thoughts.
We kiss, passion aches
as we
press our souls together
passing through ourselves
entering
each other wound up as one.
Like honey your lips
invite my
tongue to lite softly across
exploring tenderly, met
by your
darting softness.
My hand upon your cheek tracing
your
form, falling upon your neck
I follow my fingers with my
tongue
teasing your velvet valley.
We slip into the hands of mist
a
world where desires are freed from
the constraints of our
fear.
Falling loosely, our clothes, our bodies
to the floor
aching to touch all
experience each other
I enter, slow, full
of feelings
breaths release, filling the
tense yet comforting
silence.
Writhing, moving, pushing, pulling
working to find
every expression, we
dance, wet, we dance, tears, we dance
lust.
Time passes as we change, we taste
our most intimate
self
our liquid essence enticing
running warm.
We bend, we
meet, eyes transfixed
bodies vibrant energy
fused, we
release
lips trembling together as we speak soft moans of
union.
Exhaustion, rest, sleep
the morning
sun.
5-20-94
HAREM
Once again we pass
through time
touched with familiar fragments
of our pasts.
We
sample the honey whose
moment lasts as a
winter sun
its
lingering sweetness
gone with its setting.
I ache at this
closure
regretting the brevity of
your showered golden rays
of
love warming me completely
with its comfort.
And though I let
you go never
will I cease to know your splendid presence in
my
mindsheart.
1995
ATMOSPHERIC
CONFLUENCE
Release me from this gravitational
miasma
which erodes my energy --
desire -- to remain a part of
this
foolish transitory game,
I no longer hear the song
that drums
life into me -- unaware
driving me, lifting me, cradling
me
creating avenues of consciousness
in which I navigate --
the rules, all too convoluted to
be assigned as true
prompt
me to sneer, laughing contemptuously
at them and their
creators
should I do as you say because
millennium of fools
followed your
ignorant hollow commands
may your rules burn, I
wish
the fire of hatred which warms my
soul could consume all
of this hay
this stubble
leaving me here to express whatever
it
is that I find pounding my skin
seeking to break this corporeal
image.
I flounder in producing flight
towards my unfettered
origin
why is it that we look at each
other, pulled by some
sense.
We turn
our eyes meet, we reflect, reject,
and turn
away.
Yet we are pulled
again and again...back
to those
eyes
that send vibratory messages
received, understood, acted
upon.
5-31-94
ENERGIZED
This
world
burning holes through my soul
questions that seem vast
and
unconquerable days
of oppression pressing down
my skin
inverted by its
mass
grab my hand
bursting particles my
body
speeding into nothingness
incapable of grasping me
gathering myself
And yet seemingly whole
in perception
I
move about in discharged matter
false
5-9-94
MENDOCINO
LOVE
There you are again! I see you hiding
behind
vibrant blue eyes and
sparkling blonde hair. Why haven't'
I
noticed all that love bound inside you?
Waiting there, for me to
see?
At first I thought my imagination was
at play bringing me
back years to a time
that was but does not seem to be.
A place
where I first met you,
experienced you in a way that told me
no
one else could touch - and
no one else has -- Just my
imagination
I told my self. My self.
But then I see it
again
and again, faster quicker, slowly
like frames of film
flickering then
blending into one constant image
there you
were.
My love.
And I found myself falling into you and
all
those reasons which led me to you were
full in my eyes.
And I was at the only
place with the only one I desired to be
with.
And I fell into those beautiful
eyes which speak so
deeply to me.
And I touched your hair like liquid gold
and I
praised my Lord
that you are only mine.
11-2-95
FEARING
Home
late at night the show done
There you are full in my memory
I
sit and twist
Wracked with nervous anxiousness
Missing
you
Silence seems to make you
Loom
My feelings towards you
only
Limited by the fear of giving up
My power in your hands
I
could
Only lay as wept tears, small puddles of intense throbbing
for
you to taste in your reflection in bubbles glazed with
eagerness