The Tao of Twitter
By Sam R.
Copyright 2011 Sam R.
Smashwords Edition
How to Read This Book
It is not recommended that you read this in its entirety all in one time. In fact, I strongly urge you not to, even if you are a 12th level Yellow Hat.
Take it sequentially, at random, or in any other order, a little at a time. The more time you can spend on each verse, the more benefits you will be able to extract from it.
For optimum results, read each one aloud in a strong, confident voice.
WARNING: People in litigious countries should discontinue reading now.
WARNING: Transverbal epileptics should discontinue reading now.
For everyone else, enjoy!
Did you see the one with robotic ninja space pirate dragons being ridden by hyper-intelligent Nazi super apes?
I at all times around irked broad of the mark of my skull in the happening of these buttons.
In summer he was for ever forming parties to eat cold ham and chicken out of doors, and in winter his private balls were numerous.
Why is it that the advent of every true Manifestation of God hath been accompanied by such strife and tumult, by such tyranny and upheaval?
The only reason for making a buzzing noise that I know of is because you're a bee.
The difficulty in using even an ordinary pistol with accuracy is, and always has been, an acknowledged fact.
Money not spent on a luxury one considered even briefly is the equivalent of windfall income and should be spent accordingly.
The most fundamental concept in heathenry is wyrd. It is also one of the most difficult to explain.
When I consciously made the decision to become better in bed and develop my own system for sexual mastery, I did a lot of experimentation.
At this doctrine the long-faced hypocrite and the sanctimonious bigot will probably cry.
A year involves the premature premise over the discipline.
One of the biggest questions that no one ever asked is about to get answered.
I hate people like them who can't walk or see. That's why there is still a rule that says, "Only people who can walk and see are allowed"!
The foreign countries (ie. Sea Peoples) made a conspiracy in their islands. No land could stand before their arms!
I shall give you this essential advice from my inferior and childish mind.
Thrusts were suggestive of a vigorous boning, or more precisely of a rodeo event wherein one is required to sodomize a frisky Guernsey calf.
A bit of shooting, some subdued exploring, and a certain amount of "politicking."
And anyone who really knows me (i.e. my husband) would be fighting back tears if I gave them one of these.
His eyes were different and he had an evil laugh. The laugh was what I hated the most.
I am sorry Briny that I whipped you with my relief and your pace brother chased me up the stairs with a past.
Escaped by miracle from the frying pan of the green Fisherman, you come back home stiff with cold in the middle of the night.
He was deeply religious, and every Indian child loved him for his goodness and brave deeds.
Infusory cobwalls steamed. Which proves six rejoicings will disgorge!
In a surprise ending, she burps.
It really would have made your heart ache to have seen her.
Fears can often be removed or reasoned through to a logical conclusion after evaluating reality.
Herostratus was a young man who set fire to the Temple of Artemis at Ephesus in his quest for fame on or about July 20, 356 BC.
What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker.
This blonde was at a coke machine and and put her change in and mashed a button and out comes a drink.
I mean, gossip, for crying out loud! The choice is yours.
A small hamlet was at no great distance, and I betook myself thither, in the hopes of hiring a trap to convey me to the posthouse.
Finally, Multinational Treat, the owner, told Cartoon that she would teach him to make bread.
It’s clearly evident that the message of the sexual importance of the foreskin is entering into the public’s consciousness.
Santa roasted in a bubbling cauldron surrounded by Indians and happy skeletons, presents adorned a spooky dead tree.
You can trust me, I'm a doctor.
How beautiful. It really helps me to appreciate the struggles that priests have.
I really didn't know what was on the top of her head at all.
She could imitate almost any sound that she had ever heard, and each success made her eager to repeat her efforts.
He was a dynamic speaker, an empathic listener. He had a famously magnetic appeal with women.
No one dares mess with me. I beat up everyone. I broke legs, arms, and even 1 or 2 noses.
But I've also come to realize the benefits of keeping the camera tucked away in my bag and resisting my natural impulse.
When you have a crush on a friend first you need to play it cool and see if they like you back.
The spirit of the dead person is called up through a vessel of water, under a white sheet, and ritually installed in a clean clay pot.
I am just a man! I'm not giving in. All the people understand 'cuz they all fell down and prayed.
Wearing white shoes is money.
Going after our water, food & guns are next on his plate. Wake up all the People before it is too late.
Just because you found a new family doesn't mean you throw the old one away.
Why do little kids fight taking a nap? If someone told me to take a nap right now I would be stoked.
The odd one’ll slip through of course, smuggling a lucky foot or whatever. Nobody’s flaming perfect.
At the same time seize the butt with the left hand, then raise your gun.
Make schools less wholly miserable, enervating, spirit-crushing, thought-destroying, mind-rotting, child-processing conformity factories.
If there was a room full of people who did indeed love this game, your scrodom licking face would not say a god damn word!
They call you like really mean names like teletubbie or lardo or big belly then fat butt and I cry in the bathroom but no one ever hears me.
One often finds that dealing in such utter unreality makes it somewhat difficult to achieve workable solutions to real-life problems.
I feel in a anti-consumerist offshoot of ants, the pig-screen TV!
Then suppose you realize that I turned against you and brought you to the land of your enemies?
Sometimes I look around and wonder if in my next life I might be a bird.
His wife helped? When I read of helpful wives, I take it that that means that husbands haven't large businesses.
Here is a great way to spend a winter day: first, put on a nice warm Monday. You want to be sure you stay warm and money.
Meet Lopono, the lastest Maasai warrior to change his ways from lion killing!
The pupil along side of the moss greened skeletons of pissing shitting dick-nipple acrylic painting.
Her husband said: "How can such a thing be? You were lazy and didn't work, and now tell me this falsehood."
My ears perked up hearing this declaration of respect, humility, and acknowledgement of his relationship to the elders and to shamanism.
He sees the city as a total organism.
Developing shower sticks that train children in what she calls “self care”.
The results of the others didn't make sense and were ignored.
Anne should always manual Russ's sample!
Splitting the dimensions has been the goal which all of mankind has been trying to reach throughout the ages.
“Why my dear, we are in the business of unzipping your reality,” said the Rabbit. "It is the core of our praxis."
Eventually babies sleep, sore nipples heal and your energy returns.
The black-headed people ring out in song and all the lands sing their song sweetly.
Along the way some boys started making fun of him by shouting, "Go away, baldy! Get out of here!"
I know you like the way it tastes but some kids don't like getting their heads licked.
Fucking bane of my existance, that's for sure.
Writing a book has about it some of the anxiety of telling a joke and having to wait several years to know whether or not it was funny.
I saw him huddled up against a tries, shaking in the willing winter morning.
This cynical, "savvy," tough-guy phrase is the perfect emblem of our age: blustering, inhuman, cruel and ignorant.
The woman of tomorrow will not differ from the woman of yesterday in femininity or physique or capacity.
Eggs a egos sags sausages guige egos gay, you issues us ages.
If my father learns of it, he will lay hands on me! But right now, no one will stop me from telling this to my girl friend.
X-ray specs were once considered a pervert’s fantasy science fiction invention, now they have become a reality.
They told me to come back in three days and bring plenty to read.
Without resistance or fear of consequences, how much fun can looting people be?
I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history.
He says to the stranger, "Thanks so much. You're my new best friend."
Everyone was happy except for the barber, who spent the next three days cleaning up all the hair he had cut.
Yesterday, a funny thing happened to me on my way to the Conclave.
His father was a pale eyes, and the pale eyes had no ancestors. Would the ancestors reject him?
My soul had been detached from my body and was resting just above it on a cloud of marshmallow fluff, sweet and achingly tender.
Again counsel for the defense showed that the girl could not have started the fires. The charge of arson was dropped.
Do you know why witches don't wear panties?
Hey, it worked for Tom Cruise, didn't it?
She moved the button on her Saks blouse. She tweezed out two freshly surfaced hairs in her mole.
Well first of all, since he was abused as a child, I think he has an excuse for going crazy, that's how abused people end up.
My best boyfriend qualities include wholesomeness.
Light in which all of the waves vibrate in the same plane is known as fashion light.
On either side the river lie long fields of barley and of rye that clothe the wold and meet the sky.
Be careful when using your scissors, and remember to clean up the area where you fell.
I mean I can ask for a beer and where's the toilet in German, but that's no big deal. I can do that in 20 languages, that's all you need.
I'm the leader of a subversive terrorist organization composed entirely of undercover federal agents.
This is like getting a perfect letter from an ex-boyfriend, one where he says how pretty and wonderful and smart I am.
Reach not after morality and righteousness, my friends; watch vigilantly your stomach, and diet it with care and judgment.
We're expected to like shopping, cute animals and mushy shows.
Either teach him that he bless and not curse, or else depart hence with him, for he kills our children.
The smaller the monkey, the more it looks like it would kill you.
The owner came running with the dog’s open up the dirty window and told me, "I’m so sorry my dog tried to let the sun illuminate you."
Never use the confused near an open flame. It could easily hypocrisy and cause much damage.
Much to his surprise, a man's inner monologue becomes an inner dialogue.
It's getting really claustrophobic down here this in this rabbit hole.
Time is pressing, my fish! Just you come to me! Time is pressing! Just you come to me!
Their understanding thus weak in itself, and perverted by sensible delusions, is yet farther impaired by the dominion of their appetite.
And everything was relative and fast things became short and straight things became curved.
You know, sobriety is easy. It's keeping your sanity AND being sober that's hard.
Bootes iam inter 48 constellationes temporum antiquorum descriptum est, quae Claudius Ptolemaeus in libro suo commemorat.
You shouldn't be embarassed by erections and stuff, it happens to everyone (well not girls obviously). It'll be over soon enough.
He met a stubby, silent man, of goodly girth, his round head topped with a steeple hat.
Before the light of civilizing influences, the blanket-Indian has trailed the buffalo over the divide that time has set.
A pretty way this to tempt these tender and timorous souls to love their book.
Struggling to his feet, he felt something wet running down his leg. "Please, God," he implored, "let it be blood!"
Justice Mutants Of The Middle-East
Sennacherib states that he had shut up Hezekiah the Judahite within Jerusalem, his own royal city, like a caged bird.
So I got upset that he wouldn't listen and kinda yelled back at him, and without meaning to he slapped me.
Son of man, you cannot say, or guess, for you know only a heap of broken images.
My mother told me, "Don't ever change. You're original. You've got your own path."
They ate dinner and then stood in a circle. A wind swirled around them and then stopped.
Someday I'll take him under my wing and teach him all there is to know.
You don't know? Then let me tell you. You are in love with me.
Make a basin and make a mushroom ketchup. Break five leaves of salt. Take it in honey, and place in each piece of rice, add to cook gently.
Loloahi Tapui, an illegal immigrant from Tonga, claimed she was given work after a 10-minute interview.
His only comment was that it provided a pleasant snack with a thin overlay of Marmite that added nothing to its artistic merit.
The truth of life stands aghast in silence, and its brazen falsehood is loudly shouting, uttering pressing, painful questions.
Those people were never glossy like those who are fat.
It turns out that the hammer was, in fact, Mjöllnir, and his racer is imbued with the power of thunder.
They come to my home, I marry them, they use my bathroom. I treat them just like everyone else.
I'm waiting in line in a doctor's office, holding a box, like everybody else in line.
I try to be nice to people, but sometimes I get caught up in trying to fit in and I join in with the teasing instead.
An expression of anxiety passed over his face as he replied, with a well-feigned air of indifference.
“It's far too wet!” she remarked cheerfully.
This grotesque failure of hers to fathom the horrible nature of war spins ironically.
To detect falsehood and justice, to inspect the Land closely, to identify the criminal against the just, she went up into the mountains.
Chocolate is a girl's best friend. And I am a girl. Who loves chocolate.
It is strictly individualistic: there was never a structure like it before, it would be impossible to duplicate it.
It's an old story: If you want to sell something, first find the terrible affliction that it cures.
The screen would say, ‘Thank you for your donation. Peace out!’
But Zohak and his councillors, the Deevs, shut ear unto this cry, and the Shah reigned thus for the space of a thousand years.
How do you know? Has anybody tried it? No. Therefore you cannot call it an impossibility.
I have felt, therefore, that the history of this whole ABSM business will be much better understood.
I then became just me again, just the one giving a slight hug goodbye and walking off.
There are few things I enjoy more in the world than eating. I can probably count them on one hand. Or, more accurately, 2 or 3 fingers.
Concerning Witches who copulate with Devils, why is it that Women are chiefly addicted to Evil superstitions?
Have you ever eaten a crayon?
Remember, the government doesn’t own the sun yet.
You look at your wife and scream like a camper who's just spilled a jar of honey on himself in grizzly bear country.
Did you hear about the gay man who was fired?
The slavishness of the mass of our countrymen, in morals and intellect, must be an admitted fact in all schemes of regenerative policy.
Think about those actions and activities that turn you on sexually and make sure you avoid them at all costs!
If they haven't been embarrassed by this point, given all the fake news they have broadcast over the years, then it will never happen.
I said just hold it and she could go soon. Well I guess that wasn’t soon enough, so she just decided to go.
A year has passed since I wrote my note.
The less fluent I am in your language, the more I love to yell it.
A man with a car but he is married.
The glorious luster shimmers through, from intense dreams. And answers.
At which Jesus, being angry, said to him, "Thou shalt go no farther". And he instantly fell down dead.
As for those who came forward together on the seas, the full flame was in front of them at the Nile mouths!
Some federal courts in recent years have concluded that most people the agency identified as fleeing felons were neither fleeing nor felons.
Beyond perhaps an initial thrill, are these the types of environments that excite someone to go to work every day?
An old man tries to reach the youth of today by transforming himself to fit in with an outdated counterculture.
The fat bastard with the shitty presents fucks himself up in the chimney leading to a large waste removal bill.
Many hundred years ago, in the good old times of the fairies, there lived a young princess in a very grand palace.
I bet you don't even know my favorite song!
It has long been speculated, and was argued in court in one case, that these stations operate as a simple and foolproof method.
Country hearted, be of justice sending.
Again, being so illiterate in the point of intellect, and their sense so incorrected, they are farther indisposed ever to attain unto truth.
How do you get a nun pregnant?
What about the people who give the most money? Are they the greatest?
I was so tired but so happy at the same time.
I told them I was unemployed, I told them I was in jail, I told them I was dead, but they still kept calling.
There was no sign or sound from the skulls on the floor.
I leave the light to love the lapping mind go unbound in all the myths supoine.
Whenever we have an argument and both refuses to back down, he would pick me up and spin me over his head continuously until I surrendered.
Yellow denotes relatively clear water.
A wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limo one day when he noticed two men at the side of the road-eating grass.
Learning should be presented in small manageable blocks. Stimulus generalization of learning can produce secondary conditioning.
We give advice on everyday teen problems such as time management and bullies.
“I have the power to distort reality and to become a shadow. I enjoy playing with people's minds,” said the CandyCane Ninja.
He ripped out the lance embedded through his chest as if it were only a tiny thorn and then stomped forward towards a group of people.
There Guthhere granted me splendid treasure as reward for my song. THAT king was not tight-fisted!
I remember noticing how pale his lips were as he hissed out through his clenched teeth.
The serrated butter knife tossed capriciously onto the 38th Street sidewalk amid the detritus of Salem cigarette butts and a Mentos box.
Growing, changing, gaining strength, you needed me and I was there. Innocence lost, fragility gone.
And in order to have a country we must like the fact that we’re born Romanian, not curse it to death, like I do.
Never scumber susurringly. If you are a homogamy, bemonster another.
I didn't even know women COULD be satisified. Usually they just want more and more.
While different, they are just variations in standard human behavior.
You'll eventually find all the words, but your zest for life will be tattered and limp.
Why are you here? I bought you. I own you.
You dream a full garage of moral autos: auto-election, auto-decision, auto- government, autonomy.
I'd give all I own if I could but atone to that silver-haired Daddy.
Droplets of sweat trailed down his small face, soaking the soft pillow that cradled his head.
Over the past couple of decades, welfare for the super-wealthy seems to be the only kind of welfare our society tolerates.
Never punish him for wetting the bed involuntarily.
Now you must know that the princess had an old aunt who was a fairy.
The only time notes sandwiches are not so lonely is when you drop them in the sand.
Whoreson baggage, what hair she has! If it's not a wig, I never saw longer or fairer all the days of my life.
People, give thanks to the gods! Your most redoubtable enemy has fallen beneath the scythe of Fate.
My mom always told me, "If you're going through this, chances are I've gone through it, too."
If the judgment be not better settled, I would rather have him spend his time at tennis.
And so, my friends, I don't think we should place burdens on the Gentiles.
What would the foreign policy "establishment" that thrives off of conflict and military deployment do? Where would the next enemy be found?
What are you doing this weekend? I wants to see you. And also make pie with you.
He formerly wished his wife to cut off his ears, for his younger brother's head had surely been skinned.
The books will focus on the how and why of nurturing meaningful connections with the natural world in the lives of our children.
If I had my way, I'd eat watermelon every day.
In size it is as large as, if not larger than Sovereign and certainly larger than Sir J. Paxton.
She said that if I cheerful my bed and still rested the dishes I could buy the can do it.
All I hear is, "If you act like a jackass, spend all your money on 14-karat."
Still, it strikes fear into my heart when my parents enter my personal study room.
Amazing how a little sugar water perks a tired person up, at least temporarily.
Keeping the 3 symbols completely apart from one another the fourth dimension of reality can be activated which can reach dimension five.
If we want to understand our life, we have to regard it as a legitimate object of inquiry.
She always goes out with her friends. She puts on those little shorts and her high heels and takes off!
It was a broiling day at the end of July, and the railway station at Tiverton Junction was crowded with passengers.
No moderation! I stand by my enthusiasm.
Is difficult for their own eternity with childlike joy and writes in the window of the music is time we are.
Shuffling down the old rickety old stairs to the front door, the mother slid the two bolts into their nighttime positions.
The woman, sitting on the floor before the loom, continues thumping her comb as if we did not exist, her way of greeting us respectfully.
Try opening up a discussion about the biological basis for consciousness!
The boss calls it "the good stuff from down south." Whatever you say, old man.
Whenever we go out, the people always shout, "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt!"
They put a face on Mars to hint that they are proud of this religious swinery.
Why don't you be a man and be straight up and tell me the truth?
Those are your basic human needs and they are arranged in evolutionary sequence.
Teachers was struggling to keep together a large party of slum children bound for a sea-side camp.
The first is called Caculhá Huracán. The second is ChipiCaculhá. The third is Raxa-Caculhá. And these three are the Heart of Heaven.
Her skin was pale because she never went outside to rhyme. She thought if she could just finish her masterpiece!
Papucarul papucareshte papucii papucareseii dar papucareasa nu poate papucarii papucii nepapucaritzi ai papucarului.
Just what is it you can do with a wiener dog magnet? Kiki Marie is about to find out.
He lost interest in it when it became too popular. We can forgive him though, because he is dead.
“Get in there, Labor Day!” cried Coach Peace And Restfulness. “I'm counting on you to help us win the game.”
Right-thinking people everywhere are at this very moment walking around with a burning desire to shriek the word.
I begin filling it with beer cans, pull tabs, monofilament line, plastic fish eggs, cigarette butts and tissue paper with excrement.
A monkey wearing a bowtie or a cross with a sprig of parsley on top?
Before we find world peace, we gotta find peace.
His never-ending joy was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in eight minutes his favorite TV show, Fear of Living, was going to come on.
Forty years later, he still reminisces about the mud, the long lines to use a toilet, the lack of food, the constant rain.
Peter Beter, American attorney and conspiracy theorist.
I suspect that all bath towels back in the day used to be smaller.
With meditation centered inwardly, seeking no profit, satisfied, serene, heedless of issue -- fight!
Il bene piu seggreto sfugge all'uomo care non guardare avanti mai.
I can't wait until I get home. Why? So I can drink some milk.
He directs his far-seeing gaze over everything in all its complexity. He has a perfect crown and divine powers of eternal days.
Can you imagine the millions who would starve to death in the big cities where no food could be delivered?
Right now, the most profound things you're saying are, "Wow!" and "Oh, man!"
The sound of this voice was like thunder, and I noted that it had seven echoes.
Home was very lonely since mother died.
I can't say how whimsically I regret spilling milk on your toenail; you were happy about it, for which I am grateful.
A growing feeling of virtue began to replace his boredom.
After getting French country style on the brain a couple weeks back, we've been entertaining thoughts of creating that je ne sais quoi.
I call her my special lady friend and she calls me her gentlemen caller.
First there is the denotative level, one might say, the level in which the bourgeois are entertained.
These really nice napkins seem to match my underclothing.
I was lucky enough to be recruited to a focus group tonight. I love sharing my opinions!
Yes, in order to win this war, we've had to employ the very technologies we intend to destroy.
The ones where nothing of ants, the tricks of fingerpaints that a hole of the mouth right about him.
Getting closer, but I can’t remember a hasty embarrassed explaination to be debugged and back, for hope. Here is next, but I’m drunk.
And when we were children, staying at the archduke's, my cousin's, he took me out on a sled and I was frightened.
It may be a worship of the evil principle as such, a conscious attempt on the part of human minds to identify themselves with that principle.
Stop and think it over. Put yourself in my position.
Except of course I'm never a passive observer. It's more like a Star Trek "holodeck".
He gave up, like his favorite Polly Pocket.
Celebrating between the witches know on September Blue with a letter from 1969.
Finally, I found it under the pad. It ringed out when I opened my lunchbox.
What if it in the right he had taken it was soaped?
I am really anxious to know when we can start our Camping and Tramping Club.
Like human babies, baby plants all look alike.
I don't want anyone to show me what love is. But if people don't quit showing me what HATE is, there's gonna be some serious trouble.
It will be a joy and a help to every enthusiast, will add for thousands to the Witchery of Kodakery.
If you an earth-eater have become, who pulls your earth away your foe will be.
I've spent fifteen minutes reading through all of these insults.
It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see.
“I know but let’s keep it as a secret between us,” said the vicar.
In fact, there's nothing that keeps its youth so far as I know but a tree and truth.
I decided to take a moment to flip through and at least look at the pictures.
I’m imagining him making the face that OJ made when trying to get the glove to fit.
This girl lied, Duval said. "I have confirmed with the homeroom teacher the young lady stood for the pledge."
As I watch, I am consumed with envy mingled with admiration for this is what I have come to learn.
Gold is worth money and it’s fine decoration.
What you gonna do when Tigleth-Pileser III runs wild on you?
The king gazed at it and said: "Now there's a shirt for you, fit to wear on holy days!"
“What do you mean?” I asked. I knew the answer though as I looked at the empty ice cream bowls on the table.
Either someone keeps farting or the old lady next to me is decomposing.
A serial-murdering DJ plays hypnotic, minimalist ambient electronica in order to get drivers to fall asleep at the wheel.
Then we counted the kissing that we saw smiling in the fields by the side of the road.
Mathematics is not a careful march down a well-cleared highway, but a journey into a strange wilderness, where the explorers often get lost.
It seems like the crying, rocking, feeding, walking-the-floor insanity is going to last forever.
She made me wear this ugly yellow jumper and clean the bathroom while everyone was sleeping all night! I had sooo much fun.
My father, behold, the enemy's ships came here; my cities were burned, and they did evil things in my country!
If you did not suffer from emotions, from feelings, you could be as powerful as we are.
If you have 3 quarters, 4 dimes, and 4 pennies, you have $1.19.
The Black Knight describes his lost love as fattish, and fleshy, but not greet therewith.
The Tibetan view is that every human being is a potential genius.
His head was thrust into the fire by his brother-in-law in order to punish him for having surreptitiously married a sister.
There is nothing quite so impenetrable as a human mind snapped shut with bliss.
Pigs, geese, and cattle. First find out that they are owned. Then find out the whyness of it.
Dark and flashing eyes and black hair with just a shade of steely-blue in it betrayed the French blood in her veins.
Everyone comes back to shore for a picnic of Tigris sandwiches and Euphrates sundaes.
I searched my friends' houses in hopes their dad had a hidden stash of Playboys somewhere.
The Resident Evil is evidently residing in his biceps.
Going for a picnic with family friends. This is where Mum and her friend Sue play 'Who has the prettiest/best-dressed daughter'.
Then while they meditated it became clear to them that when dawn would break man must appear.
In a writing group I was in quite a few years ago, a dude submitted a story.
We’ve all heard about Uncle Joe who appeared to a member of his family to say goodbye.
The vast majority of us spend a huge chunk of our lives in the petty little dictatorship that is the average workplace.
They are a fact of life and we must accept it and do something about it. And yet, why do so many of us always get caught unprepared?
Release the super-fast angry genetically-engineered horses that can control minds!
Should the explosive farmer confess math?
Are you really in a position to decide who's rich and who's merely upper middle class?
His writings already sound very funny to me. I can imagine laughing my heads off if I do understand him.
That goes for all you punks in the press who want to print lies instead of the shit we said.
If being wealthy, successful and free to roam Europe counts as exile, sign me up.
He stared deep into my eyes and told me that we share the same heart. I know what he's saying.
She, poor, simple soul, did not know that my greatness was a-ripening!
A third eye comes in handy—if you're a lizard, that is.
Yes, I have taken a lover. His name is Zantac. He is small and round and pink.
Why do blondes work seven days a week?
It does nothing to advance research that is truly important to the public's welfare and future!
Man acts sinfully towards earth, or causes others to act so, or allows others to act so. This deprives him of happiness and perfect wisdom.
Delete all ownership information from system files!
He must have a sense of humor, and he must not be too serious, yet is able to take over a serious persona when needed.
Right away two bears ran out of the woods and ripped to pieces forty-two of the boys.
He hesitated. Only through his mother, Sun Woman, was he the child of these ancestors who guarded the sacred cave.
Dating in groups can allow you to enjoy each other's company and keep temptation in check?
He explained the names of the three hundred and forty-six stars.
The king said to her, "I want to have sex with you!", but he could not make her let him.
Sarmizegethusa was destroyed, Decebalus committed suicide, and his severed head was exhibited in Rome.
It's embarrassing to say but these women made me feel loved. My eyes would feast on their skin and it made me feel like a man.
The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
Now is not the time to insist on a spotless house or to dwell on what's going on at work while you are on leave!
On that day I wore a white mini dress with white ankle boots and white cotton knickers.
Did you know Thomas the Train has an evil twin?
We knew this was turning into a huge mess so Theresa and I look at the gas station video.
When you bring your baby home from the hospital, however, the rigors of basic training begin!
Even for the billions whose night vision has been impaired by electric light, that’s some kind of collateral damage.
The conducted history mails the overnight lesbian.
So y'all were both doing the kissing?
As for the bird which your mighty weapon captured, from now to eternity you will keep your foot placed on its neck.
It's hard to write very often when you have two annoying brothers.
I can demonstrate it, but birds, these major levels mentioned love with you.
While the rest of society moves forwards, you and you inbred mongrel children will be left behind.
Blessed is he that readeth, and they that hear, the words of this prophecy.
You led me to your banquet room and showered me with love.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear but a sharp butter knife and eight tiny gerbils.
If I was a super hero, I would reinforce tolerance and acceptance of people's differences.
Triangle does not in fact live up to the hype its cover hopes to generate.
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
Then, looking up as if to say “Show's over” she batted her eyes and slipped a wide brimmed mail-order hat over her head.
My parents may love me, but not as much as Chairman Mao.
The mobile throughput garages a matrix.
There are so many benefits to this way of eating! And I'm lovin' 'em all!
My fine motor coordination is blown this morning. Freaky. I'm blaming the alcohol.
I only wear some trendy clothes because I like them and how they look.
Would we, if we could, educate and sophisticate pigs, geese, cattle?
Everyone gathers around the Kabbalah to have cake and then there is a zohar eating contest.
I have nothing but tremendous admiration for bilingual people, I really do. I think it's amazing.
They grabbed us by the arms, made us look into their eyes. I never saw eyes like that before. It made me dizzy to look at them.
But the rope is still more horrible when it forms the noose around the necks of weak and ignorant people.
Like most educated men and women, Erasmus be his own teacher.
The friends had just finished purple when Inside found a small church. “Have you ever seen one of these before?” Inside asked.
I have attempted to paint the religious life of the typical American Indian as it was before he knew the white man.
It was a perfect crime the Army released him from the hospital.
Outside the church, strong winds ripped apart large outdoor tents and scattered chairs and folding tables across the parking lot.
It has been a wonderful experience and one which I would wholeheartedly recommend to anyone of whatever age. Yes, you CAN do it too.
A bow-shot from her bower-eaves he rode between the barley sheaves. The sun came dazzling thro' the leaves and flamed upon the brazen greaves.
To access telepathic powers in the brain, you must activate a number of areas, especially the prefrontal cortex.
I’ll be out wandering the streets from store to store, stumbling and drooling, until I find some. Goodbye.
None of us had even kissed a guy before and we did not have boyfriends.